jackxwill - pirates of the caribbean slash

Title: Through a Veil
Author: kHo (khohen1@bellsouth.net)
Pairing: Jack/Will
Rated: PG-13
Summary: Sometimes he looks at me with a great sadness in his eyes, and that's not something one who knows him expects from Jack Sparrow. One expects amusement, annoyance sometimes too, and rarely anger, but not sadness.



Sometimes he looks at me with a great sadness in his eyes, and that's not something one who knows him expects from Jack Sparrow.  One expects amusement, annoyance sometimes too, and rarely anger, but not sadness.  Sadness is something he tries to hide, and is for the most part successful.  That hat comes down just to the right point on Jack's forehead where his eyes are obscured from your view and his back is turned before you can see the sadness, his mouth moving a mile a minute about nothing in particular, his hands waving through the air as if to wipe the memory of any sort of flicker you might have seen.

But sometimes there's vulnerability in those eyes, a deep-scarred sadness, when I catch him looking at me.  His mouth hangs open and he stares wide eyed at me, not even knowing that he's doing it or that I'm catching him.  Words work in his throat and I always expect him to say something in those moments.  Inevitably, though, just before the words come his eyes blink once, twice, three times, and the guarded look is back quickly enough for me to think I've imagined it.

It's always at night, and usually when the moon is at my back.  Sometimes the only source of light we have is the moon and maybe one candle, and when there's more than five minutes of silence, that's when that look comes.  His face drains, his jaw goes slack, and there it is.  That's when I know I'm no longer Will Turner to him.  I've become my father in his eyes at that moment, and I wish I knew what he wanted to say before he caught himself.

I'll never confront him about it though.  If it's something he wants me to know, he'll tell me on his own time and in his own way.  Jack hardly ever tells you anything worth keeping in your heart in a straightforward manner anyway.  It's all in innuendo, and backtalk.  That's where Jack's heart lies... through a veil of nonchalance and poetry.  Saying one thing and meaning three others at the same time, that's how Jack operates.  A wink, a nod, a smile, and onto the next thing for him, that's his charm really.  

Still though... I wish just one time... once... he wouldn't catch himself in time.


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